After nearly two months of waiting I finally have a rejection letter and could not be happier. Some time ago I wrote a post upon finishing my first book where I detailed the unexpected, strange void that appeared. Unknowingly, I was talking about Critical Reception.
Without mentioning who or where I gave my submission to, the rejection letter was brief and to the point. I was thanked for my submission, told that the agent enjoyed reading it but that it was not something that he was looking for. Most would be mortified but some, can take this and use it.
Walls
Perhaps I am just strange but having been rejected I have found an improved focus as I move forwards where for the last two months I have been stuck with quite without a wall.
Most do not appreciate a wall, see it as an obstacle but if I don't have a wall then I have no point of reference and can find myself running around in circles not knowing which way is forward.
The simplest of things can be the best wall to reflect upon and take bearing from. A far off mountain top for the rambler, the pole star for a sailor, for the rest of us - the bar tender at the end of the road. My prospective agent may know it not but he has helped me in more ways than he knows with but two short sentences. Whether this was just a polite response or an actual honest opinion, doesn't matter. What matters is he read it, and gave an opinion. This is useful for a number of reasons because I can educate a rough idea of why he chose not to accept my book.
It could be that he spent hours littering the synopsis and sample with red ink, could be that he didn't read it at all, just glanced at the title and made a decision right then and there.
I know my work better than anyone. The only thing that I don't know, is what it is not. Whatever may have happened after I sent off the first chapter I'll probably never really know but the response gave me an insight into what my book is not and that is something that will cleave the unknown in two. I can now say for sure that my book is not something for this particular agent and this is knowledge I did not have before. I can research what authors the agent has represented, I can read their books, I can construct a deductive comparison with them against my own. It would certainly be strange if all of them were identical to what I've written but never the less, there would be enough differences for me to bounce off the wall and see where they land.
The Desert
'You're just a writer.'
is a pitiful excuse. If you've ever heard this before then you'll know that people don't know where things go. Ever handed someone a map and watched them turn it over? Well I have. As hilarious as it is to witness, it is useless because you know you're not going to get to where you want to go and that is exactly the point. A rejection is when the man hands it back and tells you it's the wrong map. You can toss it and start looking for the right one.
Without any critical reception you're still stuck without a guiding reference. You and your book could be just a stone's throw from civilisation, hidden behind an unlucky sand dune. Alternatively you could be truly lost, smack bang in the middle of nowhere or you could be on the silk road just waiting for a convoy to pass by and pick you up.
Critical reception will let you know that the metropolis is just over the hill, that you are in Death Valley or on a dangerous but none the less, important path. You're already in the wrong place and being told as much is as useful as the man that turned the map over but when someone tells you where you are not, you have options. If civilisation is where you were looking for all along then you climb the hill but if you've wandered so far off course, you can now turn back and brace the desert again.
Now that someone has told me where I am not, I've got a reference, and can divide my vector into two hemispheres. That which is the wrong direction and that which is the right one. I may still be a long, long way from where I want to go but I can get moving again. This is critical reception. If you're hungry, tired, alone and don't know where to go, you'll fall asleep and you might even die. If you're moving, you've got something to work with and it'll keep you awake.
#rejection #writing #psychology
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